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James Corden’s Argument with Himself

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Francis Henshall (James Corden) has an argument with himself about balancing his two jobs, which is especially difficult when both are secrets.

TRANSCRIPT

Roscoe Crab: Right, I need you to go to the post office-- Francis Henshall: Alright now stop going on about it, you only need to tell me once.

RC: I haven't asked you to go to the post office at all yet.

Lloyd tells me it's just around the corner.

FH: That's Andy.

RC: Collect any letters for me or my sister Rachel Crab.

This is a letter of authorization.

FH: I've already got one of those, I don't need two, do I?

RC: How come you already have a letter of authorization?

FH: This is trickier than I thought!

You're right I am gonna need that.

RC: And any letters you collect are private, is that clear?

FH: Don't you worry guv, I won't even read them myself.

RC: I'll be in my room FH: Oh I've got two jobs!

How did that happen?

You've got to concentrate ain'tcha, with two jobs.

I mean I can do it, as long as I don't get confused.

But I do get confused easily.

But I don't get confused that easily.

Yes I do.

I'm my own worst enemy.

Stop being negative.

I'm not being negative, I'm being realistic.

I'll screw it up I always do.

Who screws it up?

You!

You're the role model for village idiots everywhere.

Me?

You're nothing without me you're the cock-up!

Don't you call me a cock-up you cock-up!

[Corden slaps himself] You slapped me!

Yes I did, and I'm glad I did because-- Man, that hurts!

Good because you started it!

[Corden pulls his own hair and tie] Get your hands off me!

[Corden rolls around on floor and runs into trash cans] No!

No!

You wouldn't dare!

[laughing and applause]

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